Rules of Korea

This was posted to my Facebook account by one of my friends in Dangjin. He's getting ready to go home after a year in South Korea. It's all frighteningly true.

Things foreigners should have been told on arrival:
1) Despite popular belief... you are NOT handsome.
2) Kimchi will cure cancer.
3) Don't climb a mountain unless you check the current fashion trends.
4) Kimchi will cure AIDS.
5) Old women do have super powers, the older, the more powerful.
6) Ice cream will solve any dispute, even in the middle of winter.
7) He can understand you, but he is just seeing how many ways you can say the correct word.
8) Taxi drivers do promote whiplash and inconsistent pedal pushing.
9) Don't ask what it is till you have eaten half of it.
10) Watching TV while driving is much safer than driving and speaking on a cellphone.
11) Your body hair is fascinating.
12) No they don't sweat, its just you.
13) "Boobi Boobi" is allowed in clubs, just don't touch boobi while doing it.
14) Its fine to talk in the subway, just don't smile.
15) Your jeans will never be tight enough.